the here + now

Our week was busy. So busy. Our weekend was just as {or more} busy. Friday my mother in law came to visit along with her nephew, which is such a doll. I really didn't have any time to just sit and enjoy her company. That evening we turned on some movies for the kids and finally got to relax. That night ended up being a nightmare.  Colds started last weekend. Slowly progressed. Friday night Addie would not go to sleep until after 11pm. I was so glad when she finally fell asleep because I was tired!! And then a little after 12:30 Alex has woke up coughing and complaining about his ears. Finally got him calmed down. I gave him some Delsym and had him drink some tea. I went to bed at 2:30 At 3:00 I heard Addie screaming. She pretty much screamed, cried, threw her body all over. ALL.NIGHT.LONG. Talk about E.X.H.A.U.S.T.E.D. <---understatement After waking up I went to go get donuts for everyone {us + the youngs + bridgett and her nephew + krist...

I should probably try putting on some makeup next time and maybe one of these days not rocking the top knot...maybe  Join me and all the other ladies with  Alyssa for FRIDAY COFFEE DATE

I'm just not that mom. The one who has it all together. I have gotten frustrated with my kids way too much this week. Missed football practice and wrestling sign ups. My kids haven't had baths since Sunday.  I forgot to wear deodorant Monday. Haven't prayed as often as I should. Spewed my negativity on others in the "need" to vent.  I have cried over not being pretty enough. I have spoke when I shouldn't. I wear frumpy clothes and most days sport a messy bun.  My sink is full of dishes. There is weeding that desperately needs tending to.  I'm not a great cook. Decorating....you have got to be kidding me, how do you ladies figure this stuff out?! There are spots on the carpets, spots on the walls and handprints all over the windows. I don't have it all together. I just don't. And today is one of those days where not having it all together reminds me that I'm a failure.  A big ole mom fail. .........thankfully I have fou...

I got a late start on 20 Chore Tuesday yesterday. I wasn't planning on even trying. Tuesday morning I went over to a friend's apartment to help her pack since they are moving. Then I came home and got hit with a terrible headache, that thankfully did not turn into a migraine.  I rested a bit and then the cleaning bug hit. I thought there's no way. ....but I'll try. And try I did. But I did not finish. Here's my list: Towels kids' bathroom Our clothes Our towels Girls' clothes Alex's clothes Move office into the bedroom Clean kids bathroom Clean master bathroom Clean master bedroom Vacuum master bedroom closet Vacuum master bedroom Clean guest room Vacuum guest room Vacuum stairs Vacuum stair landing Sweep and mop front entry way Dishes Trash Clean up kitchen Clean living room Vacuum living room Around 4:30 Douglas was still not feeling well and was headed to bed which left me to take Alex to practice. I could have finis...

No I'm not talking about exercising....I know, I know I need to....I'll get on board eventually. But I'm talking about something deeper, deeper than outside appearances. When God stretches you -- to more of the person you're called to be. That place where you no longer feel like this invisible being. This place where you feel used. But not that bad used where you want to rip out your hair, the good used. The used that lets you know YOU {Katie} are useful. I'm thankful to be learning this. I'm telling you guys His grace is just amazing . Still (for me) living out that grace, that is difficult. But being reminded day after day how much I am loved by the one who made me, as complicated as I am, as crazy as my thoughts....HE knows my craziness and offers me this incredible grace. Amazes me. 

Friday evening after Olivia and Alex went to bed I took Addie and we went to Wal Mart. She needed jeans for the family photoshoot we were having on Saturday. I got her a pair of wide legged jeans and some sparkly ones...oh and some adorable new purple shoes.  I actually slept in Saturday morning until 8:00, it felt so nice. And then I spent the rest of the morning getting everything together for Alex's football game and having everything ready for the family shoot. When I got to the field for Alex's game the freshman boys were still playing and ran over. Oh this day was bound to be stressful. With a late start to Alex's game I was worried if we were going to even make it in time for pictures. But the day was beautiful! It was a perfect day for some Pee Wee football. Have I told you how much I love watching my husband coach?!!! He is sooooo good with those boys!  Little Landon did so good at the game! Awww isn't he just precious?!!!!  Once the gam...

If we were having coffee I'd tell you.... I am loving the Galatians study - GRACE is the main theme God has been trying to get me to understand. I praise Him daily for it, but am struggling with letting it really sink into my soul and letting it penetrate my heart. I am so thankful so cards or notes and received one this week on the exact day I needed one. I am sad I can't go visit my dad this weekend... He sent me a message earlier this week asking if I could fly down this weekend. I miss my dad and have yet to meet my nephew. Ohhh we received a HUGE blessing: my husband received a mid year raise {this is a BIG deal people} I am loving this fall weather! Loving it:] I love the feeling of needing to wear a sweatshirt or sweater or jacket. Join  http://ragstostitchesblog.com/  for Friday Coffee Date

Sometimes I get in my head too much.  I feel so overwhelmed. By past reactions. How others view me. My weight. Negativity. I just feel so overwhelmed in my head. 90% of the time THEY.ARE.LIES. Yet, lies I believe. Lies that hurt. Lies that change how I view others. Lies that keep me closed in. I forget about His grace even on a day I was reminded how much grace I can receive. On a day I'm told not just to praise Him for His grace -- but to let in penetrate my soul. Instead the lies sink it. The teeth of the liar sinks deep. Cuts me open. Reminds me I'm a loner. A fatty. Ugly. Unwanted. And don't forget - you have to no friends. Thank God I was reminded yesterday that the last one is definitely a lie. My husband says inside my head is a scary place. He's so right. When I push God out and let the lies sink their vicious teeth It's frightening. The thoughts. The pure darkness I feel. I'm thankful God doesn't give up on me...

Yesterday I had no desire to really clean. It was cloudy, breezy and just one of those days I would have rather sat with a book. It took me awhile But I did get 20 chores done. Maybe easier chores, but hey I got 20 done. 1) Clean out fridge - I do this weekly so it really doesn't take me long at all anymore 2) Clean the kitchen - this did however take a good amount of time 3) Sweep kitchen floor  4) Take trash to the curb 5) Clean closet - we have a closet in our kitchen where we keep our shoes and coats, it becomes very overrun by too many shoes and all the mulch from the playset makes it so dirty. 6) Clean pantry - needs to be tended from time to time 7) Dishes 8) Sweep front door area  9) Vacuum stairs  10) Clean master bedroom - on Monday we made some changes in our master bedroom. We had a Cal King mattress that was just falling apart, making it hard for us to sleep so we got rid of that and changed back to a Queen - big {small} change. W...

Friday after the kids got home from kindergarten Nini took them out to lunch at Barn N Bunk then Nini and Olivia headed to Kentucky to visit Suzie and Laila. So we were down to two kids. That evening we drove to the east side of Cincinnati to go to the Kolache Factory - only to find out it closed by 2:00 so we took Alex and Olivia to a mall and walked around a bit. Then we went to Dick's to get him a new mouth piece for football and a few other things. And this happened --- the first Pumpkin Spice Latte of the season. Gosh how I love them!!! Saturday morning I went to Martins Donuts - best donuts you'll ever have.  Then I headed to Bridgewater Fall {a shopping area near us} I needed to find white shirts for a family photo shoot. I don't know about you but I'm a mother who stays far away from white shirts. And finding actual white shirts this time of year is no one stop task. I found Olivia's shirt at TJMaxx, mine and Alex's at Old Navy and...

Ezekiel 36:26 I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. A family member gave me this verse a few years ago. I never really put much thought into it. I found it yesterday while going through some boxes in the basement. And it hit me. Hard. I can try and try and try and try to take the ugliness out of my heart, the bitterness I feel towards some people The anger, the hurt But Only GOD can take that hardness, that ugliness, the bitterness, the hurt And soften it. Only when I let HIM work on my heart. Only when I actually trust Him. So right now I give completely the yuckies of my heart. Because I need to have my heart soften, broken. So that I can love like Jesus Because right now I pick and choose who and when I will love like Jesus. And that's just no good. I want to live without freely, love others freely.

If we were having coffee together I'd tell you I am missing Arizona something fierce. I miss the mountains and the sunsets. I miss the way the sun warmed you to the core. I miss the crazy people I worked with at the salon. But what I miss most is how I felt about myself. I was working out, eating healthy. I had a rigged schedule. I miss how I felt. I miss that strength and confidence. I'd tell you going through Proverbs was such a beautiful thing. Throughout the whole study God really began working on the ugliness in my heart. Really began working in me, to make real changes. To let HIM show the grace He's been trying to show me along. I was doing so much that one day I told God I had enough, I needed a break from it and guess what He gave it to me. Seriously, more and more I fall in love with Him. This month I've really had my eyes open to his grace. Sometimes it was straight from God and sometimes it was presented from others. I'd tell you I final...

Yes I know. No one really wants to talk about gossip. We just want to gossip with no care. I grew up learning to gossip with my mom. It was one of the ways we bonded. As a teenager I was a pro at gossiping. That's sad but true. After having Alex and Olivia I joined a M.O.P.S. group at my hometown church. And gossip spread like wild fire there. So I justified the adult gossip as "that's just what women do" or "it's how women bond" LIES. The older I've gotten, I must be gaining some wisdom. As of the past few years I've thought more about gossip. The heart of it. If you don't know the heart of gossip is ugly. For about the past year, this has been one of my biggest "YOU need to work on this" issues. There have been plenty of times I've been gossiping with friends and later felt like complete trash. Why do I always fall back so easily into gossip. It's something I have to continually be working on. Wha...

My List: 1) Fold and put away master bathroom towels 2) Clean master bathroom 3) Clean master bedroom and closet 4) Vacuum master bedroom 5)Vacuum stair landing 6) Wash dry and put away kids towels 7) Clean out car 8) Wash dry and hang Alex's football clothes 9) Devotions 10) Clean tv area 11) Clean living room 12) Vacuum living room 13) Clean front room 14) Vacuum front room 15) Clean kids bathroom 16) Fridge 17) Clean microwave 18) Dishes 19) Take trash to the curb 20) Wash dry and put away mine and Doug's clothes My morning started out a little rough. I hit the snooze button twice, meaning getting up at 7am instead of 6:30. I was still feeling drained from yesterday. The kids woke up early so no rushing around, it was actually more laid back {with them} After they got on the bus I started out cleaning. I started in the master bedroom, starting some laundry and then cleaning our bathroom. Once I got that done I finally started feeling energized. By 1...