The I had planned to write a "we're done with foster care post" to this instead

We were going to be done.
We had decided we had three placements, by the time this one is over, two years as foster parents.
We realized we weren't rockstar foster parents, but we did it.
We were done.
But then
Maybe just one more.
We'll try again.
This is supposed to be hard.
We'll just take a break.
Two weeks. All summer. A month. Two weeks.
I had even planned the "we're done with foster care" post all in my head

To now.
Now that we are preparing for them leaving.
Now it's
We may or may not take a breather in between.
Where we were scared and felt very raw in all our brokenness and not enough-ness
to we were called to this for a reason.

We never intended to walk into foster care.
Or take in a teen mom.
Five months ago we didn't intend to keep going.

But we do.
Foster parents feel all their crap deeply & know we can be the worst.
But we believe. We believe through the muck we are making a difference. We believe God is doing a work unseen. A work we may actually never see.

And we trudge on.
We lean deeply into the good moments, hours, days, weeks & months.
We lean deeply into our significant other.
We lean deeply into those who choose to be there for us emotionally.
We lean deeply into God.

So I guess for now, we aren't giving up quite yet. The crazy yeses will continue in this Shannon household.