More distraction thoughs

It's messy.

This life thing.

I love the internet, mostly too much.

I love being able to talk with other moms.

To see their beautiful children.

To read what's happening in the heart of other mamas.

How Jesus is making them brave.

To pray for my foster mama friends.

But sometimes it gets too much.

See I struggle with distraction + discontentment.

Those two breed a disaster when you add in the easy always updating social media world.

I can hide in it. I can allow the noise of my phone to hide the whispers from my head, heart & from the Lord.

I can escape my struggles.

But when I escape

I lose connection

with the people around me who so desperately need me to be present.

To show up.

To step out of my comfort.

Instagram is not bad.

Facebook is not bad.

But it's not good either.

It can be used for bad.

But it can also be used for good.

It's a tool, but can also become chains. 

I don't want to miss a game of chutes & ladders with Addison.

Or miss that extra snuggle with my husband.

I want to be all in.

I've taken a break from social media. 

And it's best good. 

But hard. Because the world goes a little more quiet. 

I've been able to "get quiet"

Though this time I haven't done it alone.

And I'm not the one who proposed this.

But during this time I've been thinking a lot what it means.

Having a presence on the internet, being so involved in social media.

And for me it's all about figuring out boundaries. Discipline. And not falling into the trap of distraction to keep from getting real with God + myself. 

I don't know how to do it "right" or that I ever will, but every time I take a step back I learn more.

There's a possibility that I'm currently breaking the no social media rule for 21 days by blogging.