the here + now

I'm not going to apologize, don't expect me to. I'm going to lay it all out. My feelings, my thoughts. I'm going to lay it all out. I'm going to be as real as I can. I'm not going to put on a facade or a fake {internet} smile. I realize we are being called this direction. That this is one of those things. Those big things. Where FAITH is the answer. But it doesn't make it any easier. Here we are. Our adoption box is broken. As it should be. I cannot put adoption into a box anymore than I can fit God in a box. As so our options are placed in our faces. Foster care and then adopt Or private agency. I knew before I even talked to my husband about it which way he would be leaning towards. I knew it. I kept fighting the thoughts. But  I KNEW. And of course him being such a rock has an answer to everything. And the reminder that sometimes when God calls us somewhere it seems impossible. It seems scary.  An...