the here + now

A little over a year ago I was busted. All the hurt, the pain and everything that I tried to navigate on my own came unhinged. A few words from someone that verified what I had feared all my life, That I was not wanted.  And suddenly I was spiraling. My pieces were scattered all over the floor  And this time, no matter how he tried, Douglas could not try and pick them up and place them back together. Douglas was working with a woman that is a licensed therapist and he reached out to her for contacts. For years we talked about my need for counseling, but there were two major excuses, money + time.  It no longer mattered. I still tried to say the excuses but at this point those were beyond lame and the need was far greater than the excuses. And then one day I drove 15 minutes down 71 and to a little white office and waited to talk to a woman I had never met. And we talked. And the next week we talked. And the following. Suddenly things were getting really hard. God was bust