Tuesday, November 13, 2012

He responds

Shortly after school started Alex came off the bus with a bloody nose and then it happened again. And then one day he came home and shortly after getting off the bus my baby boy started crying. And my insides caught on fire. The momma bear inside me was ready for attack. Thankfully I have a good friend and husband that helped talk me down from that. We waited. We had to remind ourselves that kids will be wild and rambunctious and even times a little more aggressive than what ours are. But the "bullying" didn't stop. No I don't think it would be really considered bulling -- but to my momma heart it is.

It finally came to the face it needed to be discussed and that I would be the one talking to the bus driver. This woman that can only do what she can. This woman that is somehow supposed to safely drive all these kiddos while trying to make sure they behave. I get it. That's a tough job for serious. But something had to be said because my precious boy doesn't deserve being punched and for kids to be so mean.

All morning I felt stressed.

I did my shereadstruth devotional and as soon as I was done I was begging praying for God to take care of his boy. To help us figure this all out. My momma heart was beyond heavy. And then this song came on

I sat and quietly sang the words. I let it penetrate in my heart. And I just knew -- I was being sent a peace. Then I remembered about my little prayer hands. I got this idea from another instagram mom. She traced her kids hands and put bible verses on them to pray over them. Of course I loved the idea and copied. {Don't worry she was totally ok with it} I had made some and then about a month ago felt the need to change. The verse I received for Alex was

Romans 8:28

Boom. He was really feeding me His words this morning.
By late morning, I again was feeling the stress of it. I was so anxious I grabbed that bag of peanut M&Ms and smashed them. Not even thinking about it. And then 11:00 hit and I kept thinking what am I going to say? How do I present this in an effective, yet graceful way?

WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO SAY? To be the mother my son needs yet to speak with kindness.
My flesh wanted to say "who are these little bad kids hurting my son and where do they live so I can go beat up their mothers" talk about honesty -- you just received a huge does of it.

So I went outside before the bus got to our house and I prayed. I prayed for God to speak. I prayed that I didn't have to, that whatever came out of my mouth was from Him. I prayed Philippians 4:6. I prayed and prayed. And then sat quietly. The bus pulled up and tears were starting to build. And then He....oh gosh, isn't God just amazing?! How He just loves us so!!! He spoke for me. I don't even remember what was said -- but I do know she was a sweet as can be and was beyond understanding. She was helpful and we had mutual respect for each other.

Let me tell you people --- when you call on Him and act in faith -- He responds even in the little things...even in my messy motherhood.