When I first saw in an email that Ashley wanted different blogs to talk about lies they've overcome or lies they are working on I immediately emailed her back saying I'd love to. I was pretty pumped that night, I so should have wrote then. But I waited. And then I started feeling overwhelmed. And the lies started.
You are not a writer.
You talk all jumbled.
Do you really think anyone cares what you have to share.
You are not good enough.
And this is the lie I am going to share about.
This is huge for me.
This is probably the most paralyzing lie I feel.
This lie causes me to put up my guard with my husband, children, friends, family.
This lie reminds me that I never have it all together.
This lie hurts.
When my kids aren't listening and I'm feeling like I'm talking to the walls -- "you're just not a good enough mom"
When I use my tongue to tear my husband down -- "you're just not a good enough wife"
When I instead use anger towards a family member instead of fully explaining my pain -- "you are not a good enough sister/daughter/granddaughter/sister in law/cousin"
When I want to reach out boldly about Christ -- "you are terrible talking with others, remember, you are an introvert, leave the boldness to the extroverts"
If you know me at all --- you know I have not overcome this lie.
But I'm working on falling into His grace.
To remember I don't have to be "good enough" because
HE is more than enough for me.
I will fail. Always.
There's no way around that.
But His grace & mercy & love & discipline
is more than I could ever expect.