Skip to main content

Jesus has never let me go


I was born August 9th, 1985...yes folks, I'm approaching 30 soon.
{which I is totally off subject I used to almost have panic attacks about, but now I'm embracing it}
Mountain Home, Idaho

My heart stopped.
My surgeons told my dad don't expect either to live but your baby will be born dead.

God had bigger plans.
From a young age I always felt this pull towards God.

My mom was a single mom of three.
I had two younger brothers.
I was just like how my Olivia is, little momma.
I adored helping care for my brothers, especially my youngest. He is 6 years younger than me and was my baby and will always be so.

and now the hard parts of the story....

....molestation....
...fear...
....step-father...
...brother being beat...
...bruises...
....hearing my mother being raped....
...lonliness...
...food...
...starving & purging...
...lying...
...abandonment...
...insecurity...
...cutting...


That's her story --- that's not where she's going

That is where I have been.
That my be my story.
But that is the past.
God had bigger plans for me.
He has bigger plans for me.

I don't need to live there.
But to look forward...because I mean

How blessed am I?!!!
I don't need to live in the past.
I don't need to worry about my future.
Jesus overcame the grave.
I can overcome all of my past.
Those scars no longer hold me captive.
But I can tell my story of how Jesus never let me go.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you HOPE and a FUTURE.
-Jeremiah 29:11

God didn't intend for me to hurt, but even though I went through it I have HOPE and a future full or wrestling when saying Yes to Him.





Also wanted to share this beautiful print Courtney designed.
Just visit the Overcome The Lie website to make your purchase!!


Comments

  1. whew. katie.
    this is beautiful.
    thank you for sharing your story.
    praise God that you're not stuck in it -- for freedom you have been set free!! {Gal. 5:1}

    love you, sister!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wow. Amazing story. So awesome girl. And now to continue writing it!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Beautiful, beautiful post!! So happy Jesus has helped you overcome so much in your life!! I know He is using, and will continue to use you and your heart!

    ReplyDelete
  4. yeah I already commented but I am again. we seriously need to get together at influence this year. I have a feeling we'll be the BEST of friends.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Coffee date - you + me WILL happen and are you a hugger? because I plan on giving you a HUGMUNGO one!

      Delete
    2. I AM SO A HUGGER!!!
      oh I can't wait!
      I'm probably going to cry + laugh at the same time, just so you know.

      Delete
    3. OH I just cannot wait!
      Hurry up September! :)

      Delete
  5. Katie, thanks so much for sharing this. I love your courage. Probably every one of your readers can relate to at least one of those things on your list (or more) and it helps us all feel less alone. And the truth is, some of us still experience the fallout from those hurts and when we tell each other, we give each other the gift of going second. And that moment, the one where you catch your breath and think, "You too?" is one of the best moments you could have.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Oh Katie, your life is a living testimony of God's goodness. He will continue to redeem those past hurts in your life, and to shower his love and mercy on you. Thank you for your faith and courage.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Girl Behind the Blog

I'm linking up with the lovely Ashley from  Written On Her Heart  and Mackenzie from  Life of a Pint Sized Mama Oh and my Al man decided he wanted to do a video too Thanks for stopping by!!

Influence Link Up

Hello if you don't know me I'm Katie I {obviously} blog here and you can find my instagram & twitter ---> Two things in my bag: 1. My cute little notebooks I found at Target and a variety of pens. I love pens. No seriously, you should see my pen + sharpie box.  2. My phone. I am a HUGE picture taker. I love taking pictures and using all the fun picture apps and posting pictures. If you love taking pictures come find me, we can have some instagram fun!!!  Two things I'm looking forward to: 1. Hugs & coffee with friends. Friends I've never technically met. Friends that I will never forget, that will be hard to leave, that just get me. 2. Learning. Learning more about who I am. About the amazing way God created me as a woman. Learning from all these wise women that live with realness and grace. Being filled with His word. See you in 2-ish weeks!!!

We are not part of his story and he is not part of ours

"Write drunk; edit sober" -Ernest Hemingway I've never actually attempted this, but tonight I am. I've had my wine and if you know me at all it doesn't take much to get my lightheaded & giggly. I'm truly not a Windau (my maiden name) when it comes to my alcohol consumption. I put my catholic roots to shame. I'm ok with that. I'm not a mean drunk, but a purely giggly & say inappropriate thing drunk. Today stung. It stung hard. Last Tuesday we got a call for a little 5 month old baby. Technically we got a call for 4 boys but for reasons that I will not share, we could only say yes to little guy. And then there was waiting. And more waiting because our agency couldn't find a home for 4 of the little guys, they came from a sibling group of 6. All 6. Boys. That would be headed for permanent custody. In my mind all the things lined up. I had prayed for an orphan. I had been learning about how to bond with a baby in the adoption sens...