Thursday, May 22, 2014

"Most days I'm managing blessings"

Guys let me be honest.
I talk very passionately about foster care & knowing God has called us here.
Rainbows & sunshine.
Not really.
It is in our hearts.
We're here.
We are present. 
We aren't walking away.
But guys, some days it's just HARD.
Bringing in children who you didn't birth.
Children that you will fall in love with, knowing they just can't wait until the judge finally says "it's time to go home"
Children who you have not raised.
The appointments, and meetings and visits.
The lack of communication.
People making decisions about these children who do not live with them, do not see the need for this or that. People who make a decision & sometimes you do want to punch them in the face.
And other days you're so thankful you do not have that burden.
I've never been so thankful for social workers.
I've also discovered. NO WAY. Would I ever want to be a social worker. 

But there's always glimmers of hope.
Love. Joy. 
You meet people and can touch lives.
And sometimes when you think you will be doing all the work, people you didn't except to will touch your heart.
You learn to not see bio parents as enemies, but people you are rooting for, praying for.
You learn that fast food is just sometimes necessary if you want to have a meal that day.
You learn to loosen your grip.
You learn to parent completely different. 

You feel the struggles. The heart breaks and you wonder if you'll be able to do it the next day. 
You hear "I could never do that" & "thank you for being foster parents"
when what you really want is someone to say "how can I help" or "here's a bottle of wine"

You learn that this is your road.
That is most circumstances, no matter how kind people appear to be about this, they just don't get it.

But this journey, this road, God has lead us down.
It's kingdom work.
It's hard & impossible & scary.
It's beautiful & fun & full of hope.

1 comment:

  1. Managing Blessings, what a great perspective. Katie, thanks so much for sharing your story. It's really cool to hear about your journey as a foster mom. I think that I would like to do that some day, so it's cool to hear from someone who is in the midst of it. I really appreciated what you said about social workers :) I just finished my MSW and will be jumping into those big decisions probably sooner than I even realize. It's nice to know there are people out there who do appreciate all of the hard work we have to do.